It happens in such a noninvasive way I barely realize it until I’m 20 minutes into scrolling…the moment my mind isn’t stimulated enough or wanders off looking for an escape, I find it processing the images that flood my Instagram feed. It feels noninvasive, but really it’s more invasive than anything. Because the images I see are the lives and stories I compare myself to, and because I find myself observing so often, it reaches beyond a normal environment of comparison and into the walls of my home. Comparison happens in my hands at the end of my fingertips. The apparent success that others are championing finds its way into my heart and bleeds through every block of accomplishment that has been a part of building me. I should double tap and give it a “like”, but I can’t bring myself to do it. Mixed feelings of wondering why I am where I am and how she got where she is weighs me down to the point of scrolling even more just to forget why I was scrolling in the first place.
Why do we do it? Seriously, why do we scroll through social media? What is the intention behind it? Because I don’t want to use it as a measuring stick and means of evaluating myself and where God has me verses where He has someone else. Just because she is successful doesn’t mean I’m not. We are two separate people created in two unique ways for two specifically different purposes. She was designed for the plan on her life and I was designed for the plan on mine. When I compare myself to anyone else, it is an unfair comparison. Because I am not meant to what she does and she is not meant to do what I do.
Maybe if we just focused on where we are called to be, so obsessed and fulfilled and consumed with it, we wouldn’t have time to worry if we are where we should be because we would just know. We would know because we’re all there and we sense the impact of what that means. The impact of being all in. If I rest in knowing I am where I’m supposed to be then I can just let her be where she is without feeling the pressure to be there too. And that’s the thing, no one else has those expectations of me. Just me. So, as we scroll through the images that plague our minds and infiltrate our hearts, may we scroll knowing our life isn’t meant to look like theirs. And that’s not only okay, it’s beautiful.